How to be "Confidently Single" this Holiday Season


Well, here we are Thanksgiving Eve.

The year is coming to a close and we’re running straight into the holidays at christmas-light speed. Am I the only one who isn’t ready? Whether you’re thrilled or terrified, there are countless social and family situations that we will all, most likely, be thrust into for the duration of November and December. But don’t fret, we’re all in this together and we’ll get through it. I promise!

It is safe to say that a huge source of apprehension about the holidays is rooted in the dread of facing our families. A particularly tough predicament is doing so alone. You haven’t managed to lock in a relationship before the last quarter of the year, and you just know that everyone is dying to ask about your personal life at the next gathering. No matter what state your career, health, social life etc. are in, we all know that we’re under scrutiny if we’re not coupled up. It’s understandable; your family just wants to see you happy and know that you’re being taken care of. There isn’t any malicious intent in their prying questions, as intrusive as they may come across. Try to remember that it’s coming from a loving place, and prepare yourself to answer these questions with grace, poise and confidence!

To handle the awkward interrogation, here are a few tips to dodge all those crazy questions with the cofidence of Beyoncé and the quick witt of Amy Schumer.

1. Tell Them How Amazing You Are Already

For this, try to bring focus back into what good things you already have going on in your life. Highlight the fact that that you could probably not accomplish these things if you were rolling in the deep of a relationship. “I can’t really focus on guys right now because my internship and job take up so much time, and I want to maintain my 4.0.” Who can argue that? It’s not bitchy to pat yourself on the back with a little bragging to take the focus off of the man who’s not in your life.

2. Tell Them Your're Dating MANY People

There’s also the opportunity to throw them off your trail with a joke that doesn’t answer their question, but shuts them up. “I was dating so many guys that I couldn’t remember their names, so I broke up with all of them.” You might get a few blank stares of confusion, but a non-answer is a clear indicator that you don’t care to speak on a particular topic.

3. Tell Them The Truth(ish)

Another dreaded question to answer is any inquiry about a guy or girl who you brought around last year, but are no longer seeing. “What happened to that nice boy Richard?” Of course you don’t actually want to divulge the details about how Richard had dad issues, or cheated on you, or moved out of state for a new job. It’s tough to be reminded of an ex-lover by being called out by a family member. Prepare for that awkward moment, and the obligatory pity that your family might throw your way when you let them know that things didn’t work out. If you’re bold enough, shut them up with dark humor. “Well, he cheated on me, so I killed him.” No more questions from cousin Jenny.

Remember that you knew your family members as a single person first. You’re no less an adult by being single, and you should take advantage of the opportunities you have to visit with them. It’s only once a year, after all, and there’s more than likely enough baked goods and spiked drinks around to lessen the pressure. The holidays are a time to reflect on the past year and how you hope to spend the year ahead. There’s nothing wrong with spending this time alone, and saving some money by not buying Christmas gifts for some guy who never treated you right anyway. Treat yourself instead!

Aaron is a fresh face in LA who isn’t as naive as it may appear. With a background in journalism and event coordinating, he loves to implement creativity into his professional and personal life. Leading with heart and hope, he encourages all around him to be passionate, playful and wise.